Fear….What a Bitch.

“Only thing we have to #fear, is fear itself.”–Franklin Delano Roosevelt uttered these words during his first inaugural address. It rings true throughout every aspect of life. The element of fear can be debilitating for some, while a driving force for others. What is it that makes the determination? What causes some people to fuel their fire while facing their fears, but the same fear sends other people running for the nearest sandbox in which to stick their heads? Life experience? Genetics? A combination? Neither?


I have lived my life afraid of so much, and yet, I have faced many fears in my life. Some fears I conquer easily, like I am freaking Wonder Woman. Other fears, have me emotionally, and somewhat physically paralyzed, as though I will die if I have to deal with the consequences of dealing with the fear.  But really, would I die? Is my fear really so terrible that I would die of it? Probably not, but in some cases I have convinced myself of the fact I am stuck, without options but to stay in the place I fear. What will it take to move myself from this place of fear, to the other side? The side that holds everything I want….feeling uncomfortable enough in the fear, that I desire change more than I fear it. Sounds simple, right? In some cases yes, but in other more complicated, intricate situations, not so much.

I have learned one thing, I need to be patient and understanding with myself. I need to stop coming down so hard on myself when I fail, or do not even try because I am afraid. I need to stop assessing blame, and start assessing what the problem is and how I need to adjust my plan to ensure success. I need to think about what I would tell my children, if they were in my situation, and apply the same understanding, empathy, and love to myself. I need to love me as much as I love others. So now that I have figured that part out, the rest will come in time.

My past life experiences have left me traumatized, afraid, totally lacking confidence in my ability to accomplish my goals. While I am not responsible for putting myself in this hole, I am responsible for getting myself out. I refuse to spend the rest of my life being a victim of circumstance. Others have concurred far scarier things than I have faced, and if they can thrive as opposed to just survive, so can I. Instead of sitting in ‘I can’t,’ I am going to change my view to ‘I can.’ I may not have all the answers right now, and that is okay. I will find my way, anyone can if they believe and have faith in themselves.

“Only thing we have to fear, is fear itself,” and once we move through that fear, everything we want is on the other side. It is a journey through life to get to what we want. Every experience along the way is designed to teach us something, and give us opportunity for growth. Seize every single one, good, bad, ugly, or beautiful. Do not let one moment of one day pass you by, do not sit on the sidelines, but rather, be an active participant in your own life. It is going to happen, with or without your participation.

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